I rewrote this poem today to give to someone. I had to write it 6 times before I made it all the way through.

I great girl told me to think positive. So this is for her.

"Just one look into your eyes
One look and I'm crying
'Cause you're so beautiful

Just one kiss and I'm alive
One kiss and I'm ready to die
'Cause you're so beautiful

Just one touch and I'm on fire
One touch and I'm crying
'Cause you're so beautiful

Just one smile and I'm wild
One smile and I'm ready to fly
'Cause you're so beautiful

Oh and you're so beautiful
My darling
Oh you're so beautiful
You're so beautiful"

Feb 28, 2005

the beginning of a new me.

Happy 5 month anniversary, Jasmine

Goodbye

Everything comes to an end,
that's just the way of the world,
I see my destination,
just around the bend.

I wish you hope and happiness,
no one seemed to have a clue,
Even though I'm no longer here,
I'll always be truely in love with you.

There's just no escaping death,
Not him, not you, not me.
I'll make sure I whisper "I love you",
with my last fleeting breath.

Goodbye to all, I'll see you again,
The choice is all but done,
The sadness will be short.
I'll be in heaven,
finally happy with my son.

Ron Wertz Feb 25, 2005 Age 24

I'm sorry for what I've done, and I'm sorry for what I may do.

RonWertz.com is coming up on it's 1 year anniversary soon, and I'm happy to say that it'll be around for another year. Ha, no blahblahblah.blogspot.com here! Take that, yuppies! Everyone here ( and I phrase it that way because at this point, I don't really consider most of them "friends" in the sense they used to be) finally decided to jump on the blogging wagon. It's funny to see them start to write, mainly rambling on about how it's the latest craze, etc. It will be interesting to see how many of them continue it on more than a weekly basis, or if at all.
The latest around here is that the tooth I broke on a grain on rice 3 years ago finally abscessed. It cause some severe swelling on my lower jaw, as well as my cheek. It's a terrible, constant pain. After the lortabs and penicillin kept making me sick, my dentist switched me to amoxicillin and darvocets. I still get nauseous from it, but it seems to have curtailed the swelling quite a bit. It still causes an enormous amount of pressure on my brain, giving me some crippling headaches. I finally get the tooth cut out on Weds., and I can't wait.
The neon has been on a downward spiral since I moved from Florida. Now it won't stay running because the fuel pump acts like it's dead. I thought it just wasn't getting any voltage, but it whines just a tiny bit when you put power to it. So neither car is running, and that means no way to work. Don't know how I'm going to manage this situation, as I haven't been to work in the last 3 days.
Soon, before everyone decides to move away, I'm going to let my feelings be known about the people around here. Everyone is content on saying things about people behind their back, but never has anything to say when confronted about it. I'm not a hard person to get along with, by any means. I do have my faults, just like any individual, but I really try with these people. But when it comes down to it, the only friend I have in Clemson is Jasmine. She really is everything I could ever ask for. When I look into her eyes, I see beauty unparalleled, compassion, and love. She truly cares for me, and for that, I am blessed. I would do anything, and in some instances I have done anything for my friends here, and for some reason each one of them seems to have formulated some unsubstantiated claim in which to hate me. I try to just shake it off, and act as if nothing's wrong, but lately it's been driving me crazy. Maybe it's too late. I just want them all to realize what, at least at some point, they meant to me. I spend my time with Jasmine because she calls, im's, and generally acts like I exist. I don't think that's too much to ask from the people here, but on the other hand, maybe it is.

Losing my reason
I was driven to such behavior;
illusion?
I don't know--
let someone else decide.
--Ariwara no Narihara


Remember me when I am gone away,
Gone far away into the silent land;
When you can no more hold me by the hand,
Nor I half turn to go yet turning stay.
Remember me when no more day by day
You tell me of our future that you planned:
Only remember me; you understand
It will be late to counsel then or pray.
Yet if you should forget me for a while
And afterwards remember, do not grieve:
For if the darkness and corruption leave
A vestige of the thoughts that once I had,
Better by far you should forget and smile
Than that you should remember and be sad.

Haha, had to respond to Mr(s). Annoy-omous.
"You were born in the early 80s, and you wouldnt have the motor control in your fingers required to type until at least.....86, therefore you could only have been blogging since the late 80s, and more likely, early 90s."

This is funny on mannnnny levels. I was born in the early 80's, 80 in fact. So you're doing well!
Motor control in my fingers by 86.... Please, I was state thumb wrestling champ from 83-87.
could have only been blogging since the late 80's..... Al Gore didn't invent the internet, or pants, until like 94.

And Justin and I have been kicking it old school for decades, clearly since the early 80's....

8:20 am, back from work and time for bed. Goodnight 3rd shifter's and late night drifters!